What actually happens
Most explanations of this kind of product describe features. Here is the sequence instead, in the order a family lives it.
Before anything happens
Margaret sets it up — or her daughter does, with her permission
The accounts that matter go in: her email, the bank, the insurer, the pharmacy. Relay works out which ones unlock the others — her email resets almost everything, so it is the one that matters most. She names Sarah as the person who can step in, and her GP as someone who can confirm a real emergency. Nothing is open. Nothing is shared.
Tuesday afternoon
The call comes
Margaret is in hospital and will not be managing anything for a while. Sarah needs the pharmacy account, the insurer, and eventually the bank — and has none of it.
Within minutes
Sarah asks, and Margaret is asked first
Sarah requests access. Relay does not ask a stranger to adjudicate — it asks Margaret, in case she can simply say yes. She cannot answer, so after a short window it moves on.
The same afternoon
The GP confirms it is real
He gets one question: is this genuine? He is never shown anything of Margaret’s — not then, and not after. He answers yes, and that is the whole of his involvement.
Immediately after
Only what Margaret chose opens
Sarah gets exactly the items Margaret assigned to her, most consequential first, so she is not reading a list at the worst moment of her month. Everything she opens is recorded. Everything she does not open is recorded too.
Six weeks later
Margaret comes home, and it closes
She checks in. Sarah’s access ends the same minute — no awkward conversation, nothing to ask for back. Sarah is told what happened and thanked, and Margaret gets a record of exactly what was opened while she was away. The vault is armed again, ready for next time.
The last step is the one nothing else does. Every other way of doing this — a shared note, a deputy, a legacy contact — is a door you open once. Relay is the only one that closes again on its own, which is what makes it safe to set up before you need it.
What people use it for
A hospital stay
The one this is built for. Bills keep arriving, prescriptions need refilling, and the person who normally handles it is on a ward. Access opens for as long as it is needed and ends when they are home.
Caring for a parent whose memory is going
Not a single event but a slope. You need more over time, they stay in control for as long as they can, and every step is recorded so no sibling has to take anyone’s word for anything.
Travel, surgery, or anything with a date on it
Two weeks somewhere with bad signal, or a procedure with a recovery period. Give someone what they would need if you were unreachable, and take it back when you are not.
Relay is not a will and does not handle inheritance. If that is what you need, an estate attorney is the right call — this is about the years before that.
How it compares
These are the four things people actually choose between. We have included the rows we lose, because a comparison where the newcomer wins everything is not worth reading.
Works while they are alive but cannot manage things
A stroke, a long hospital stay, dementia. Apple requires a death certificate before a legacy contact can request access.
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans●YesYes
- Bitwarden Emergency Access●YesYes
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list●YesYes
Someone has to confirm the situation is real
Bitwarden uses a waiting period you set (1 hour to 7 days) — if nobody declines, access opens on a timer rather than on a person confirming.
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans—NoNo
- Bitwarden Emergency Access◐PartlyPartly
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list—NoNo
Access can be taken back afterwards
They recover, they check in, and what opened closes again on its own.
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans—NoNo
- Bitwarden Emergency Access—NoNo
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list—NoNo
Each person sees only what you chose for them
Rather than the whole vault, or the whole account, or the whole notebook.
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans◐PartlyPartly
- Bitwarden Emergency Access—NoNo
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list—NoNo
Covers accounts across everything they use
Not just one company’s ecosystem, and not just passwords.
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans●YesYes
- Bitwarden Emergency Access◐PartlyPartly
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list●YesYes
A record of who opened what, and when
- Relay●YesYes
- Everplans?Not publishedNot published
- Bitwarden Emergency Access?Not publishedNot published
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list—NoNo
Guided planning: templates, checklists, what to gather
Everplans is genuinely better at this. If what you want is help thinking it through, start there.
- Relay—NoNo
- Everplans●YesYes
- Bitwarden Emergency Access—NoNo
- Apple / Google legacy features—NoNo
- A shared note or password list—NoNo
Already set up, nothing new to buy
- Relay—NoNo
- Everplans—NoNo
- Bitwarden Emergency Access◐PartlyPartly
- Apple / Google legacy features●YesYes
- A shared note or password list●YesYes
Years of track record behind it
Relay is new. Everyone else in this table has been doing it longer, and that is a real reason to choose them.
- Relay—NoNo
- Everplans●YesYes
- Bitwarden Emergency Access●YesYes
- Apple / Google legacy features●YesYes
- A shared note or password list?Not publishedNot published
Checked against vendor documentation on 8 August 2026. Where a company does not publish whether it does something, we say so rather than guessing. If you believe a cell is wrong, tell us and we will correct it — these are their products, not ours.
One vault, the whole family, $119 a year.
See Relay for caregivers